We knew that my younger brother had become a teenager the day he slouched down the stairs one morning, our dad asked him ‘How did you sleep’… and my brother snapped, ‘What’s it to you??’
We all know that teenagers are moody and stroppy at times. Their hormones are doing weird things to them, everything is acutely embarrassing, they think they’re the centre of the universe, and they’re going through all sorts of bodily and social changes that don’t even bear thinking about. Whilst it’s normal for this type of behaviour to kick in in the teenage years (and even earlier, as children achieve puberty at an earlier age these days), how can you tell if it’s more than hormones – how can you tell if maybe there’s something really wrong?
Teenage depression is surprisingly common, with an estimated 2% of teenagers suffering from the condition. It can be serious, deadly even, but it can be easily treated if recognised. The trouble is spotting it amongst all the ‘normal’ face-pulling and painting rooms black.
There are lots of social reasons why teenagers might become depressed. Bullying increases as children hit secondary school; they are much more aware of problems that may exist at home; they may be self-conscious of their size or shape. It’s all about fitting in as a teenager, and if a teenager feels they are the odd-one-out they can become very despondent. It can be biological, with neurotransmitters in the brain going haywire when the hormones kick in. Whatever the cause, though, teenage depression can be differentiated from normal teenage angst by monitoring whether moods improve over time, whether they seem sad or complain of isolation.
Any person with depression, regardless of age, can find it hard to think rationally. It’s also very hard for a person with depression to recognise that they’re ill or that their thinking is out of line with reality – for example, they may genuinely think that the world would be better off without them in it, and it is very hard for a person in that state to argue themselves out of it.
The sort of things to look out for include a lack of motivation (for school, friends, self-care), withdrawal from family and friends, preferring to spend hours alone. They may also sleep longer than even most teenagers, may eat less or over-indulge. They may also start with anti-social or self-destructive behaviour . Other symptoms include:
- Poor concentration
- Feelings of guilt
- Apathy
- Finding it hard to make decisions
- Complaining of pain or fatigue
- Behaving irresponsibly or rebelliously
- Becoming ‘nocturnal’ by sleeping in the day and being awake at night
- Being sad or hopeless
- Being anxious or expressing feelings of guilt
- Anxious behaviour
- Withdrawal (from friends or family).
However, many teenagers can exhibit these signs without actually having depression.
Depression can run in families, so if there is a family history and your child is exhibiting these symptoms then they may have depression. But use your instinct – you know your child better than anyone. If you think your child is depressed then get them to a GP and keep taking them until someone takes it seriously. You have to fight for your child. They may be teenagers but they are still your responsibility and they are still young enough to need taking care of. Even if they don’t want to go to the doctors, use your parental authority to make them go.
Treatment can include talking therapies (usually Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, though this is of limited use for severe depression and other talking therapies are necessary then), usually combined with anti-depressants. Modern anti-depressants are not addictive and have few side-effects. If a person with depression has more than two episodes, they may well need anti-depressants in a low dose for a considerable period.
If your teenager becomes severely depressed then they may start to self-harm, and may even attempt or commit suicide. Warning signs to look out for include them giving away personal possessions, seeming to tie up ‘loose ends’, giving up on themselves, expressing the view that no-one cares or that everything is hopeless. They may even be open enough to say that they want to die. Don’t bury your head in the sand – don’t let it get that bad, take them to the doctor. You can also call your local Crisis Team (usually based in the mental health unit of your local hospital) for urgent help.
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